Nutrition After 40: My Shift from Eating Less to Fueling Strength
By Erin Aben | Co-Founder of Excellence In Fitness
If you’re a woman over 40 who has spent years trying to eat less, burn more, and make your body smaller, you might recognize some of yourself in this story. I’m still figuring out what works for me, but lately I’ve been thinking differently about food and what I need from it.
With our kids grown and mostly out of the house, I have more time to pay attention to my own health. I say “mostly” because our front door still feels like a revolving door, and I love that. Having them keep coming home is exactly what I hoped for.
A few weeks ago, I wrote about finally making strength training a priority. At 53, I’m thinking about how I want to feel and what I want to be able to do over the next 20 or 30 years. Training with Joe has become part of my routine. Nutrition is the part I’m still working on.
For most of my life, my question was, “How little can I eat and lose weight?” Now I’m trying to ask, “Am I eating enough of what my body needs to get stronger and feel good?”
Where My Ideas About Food Began
My mother was a ballet teacher and, God bless her, she noticed how people looked, dressed, and carried themselves. Growing up, I picked up on those things. Appearance mattered, and I started worrying about my own body pretty young.
My dad came from an Italian family that loved food. Food was how we celebrated, spent time together, and took care of each other. Some of my happiest memories involve a crowded table and something delicious to eat.
So I grew up loving food and worrying about what eating it would do to my body. That’s a hard combination, and it followed me for a long time.
The Diets Changed, but the Goal Stayed the Same
By middle school, I was already trying different diets. I remember running for hours because I thought burning more calories would get me closer to the body I wanted.
That continued, in one form or another, for more than 30 years. About five years ago, I lost a significant amount of weight through fasting. If you were my friend then, you probably heard all about it. I talked about fasting constantly because I thought I had finally found something that worked.
But over time, the weight came back, and not necessarily where I would have chosen. I had lost weight, but I hadn’t found a way of eating I could comfortably keep up.
And yes, the irony is pretty obvious. I’m married to a personal trainer, and Joe and I have owned Excellence In Fitness for more than 20 years. I’ve heard plenty of good advice. But understanding it and changing how you feel about food and your body are two very different things.
What I Want to Be Able to Do
At 53, I want to feel good and be able to enjoy the things Joe and I love doing together. We want to keep skiing and traveling. I love being out sailing on the Chesapeake Bay. When the kids come home, I want to spend the day with them at the Maryland Renaissance Festival without wondering whether my back or my energy will hold up. And I want to walk the Annapolis Boat Show and enjoy it, even after hours on my feet.
Those are the things I think about now when I’m training. They also give me a reason to pay more attention to how I eat.
I still want to lose weight. I don’t want to pretend that suddenly stopped mattering to me. But I also care about getting stronger, having energy, and feeling good between workouts. I’m trying to find a way to work toward all of that without falling back into another diet I can only keep up for a few months.
Enjoying a day on the water. One of the many reasons I want to keep getting stronger.
Sorting Through the Nutrition Advice
Once I started paying more attention to nutrition, I realized how much conflicting advice is out there, especially for women my age. Eat as soon as you wake up. Don’t eat until noon. Never exercise on an empty stomach. Fast longer. Don’t fast at all. It’s a lot to sort through when you’re just trying to take care of yourself.
I’ve been looking more closely at the research because I want to understand what applies to me and what deserves a little skepticism. I also know that a study can tell us something useful without giving every woman the same answer.
The questions I keep coming back to are pretty practical: Am I getting enough protein? Am I eating in a way that supports my workouts? Can I keep these habits up while still enjoying meals with my family?
And when I read advice about weight loss, I’m paying more attention to what it says about muscle, strength, and overall health. For years, I would have skipped straight to how much weight people lost.
What I’m Working On Now
I’m trying to keep this manageable. I know how easily I can turn a few changes into a whole new set of food rules, and I don’t want to do that again.
For now, these are the habits I’m working on:
Including protein at each meal. I’m paying attention to breakfast and lunch instead of getting to dinner and realizing I’ve barely had any.
Eating more regularly. I’m trying to stop treating how long I can go without eating as an accomplishment.
Making time to eat around my workouts. That means planning ahead a little, especially when the workday gets busy.
Keeping variety in my meals. I’m still eating fruits, vegetables, carbohydrates, and fats. I don’t want protein to become another thing I obsess over.
Noticing how I feel. I still check my weight, but I’m also paying attention to my energy, hunger, and how my workouts are going.
Some days go better than others. Food is still a comfort for me, and I enjoy going out to dinner and eating with my family. I want to take care of my health while keeping those things in my life.
You Don’t Have to Have It All Figured Out to Start
I spent a long time knowing that strength training would be good for me without making it a consistent part of my own life. Since January, I’ve been training twice a week with Joe. I’m glad I finally started, even though I’m still figuring out the nutrition part.
If any of this sounds familiar, I hope you’ll feel comfortable walking through our doors. You don’t need to lose weight first or arrive with your eating habits sorted out. I certainly didn’t.
Joe and I have spent more than 20 years building Excellence In Fitness around personal attention. You’ll work one-on-one with a coach who gets to know you, helps you learn the exercises, and guides you through each appointment.
If you’re ready to start getting stronger, we’d love to meet you at our Annapolis or Millersville studio. A complimentary consultation gives us a chance to hear what you’re hoping for, answer your questions, and show you how we train.
Erin
